A Self Discovery

I wonder if I will ever stop surprising myself. Sometimes it can be painful though, when learning something new about myself. I have to admit in this instance it was extremely painful and even humiliating. I have often tried to get my girls to run. Succeeding with Madison at the age of 4 running a half a mile. I was so proud. However, I have failed in getting Savannah to run long distances with me. The key to her has always been short distances. Say, if I race her to the end of the street, or to the front door.

Savannah and I were walking home from school and I asked her, "Do you want to race home?" "Sure, mom!" So I ready, set, and go, and before I knew it she flew in front of me. Now I am a kind mom and usually let me kids win. But I suddenly had the realization that her being in front of me had nothing to do with my compassion, she was really kicking my butt. So naturally I sped up, thinking in just a matter of seconds I would be alongside her. Now for the humiliation, I couldn't catch up to her. To my benefit, however, I did close the gap. But that was all I could do. We got home and I came bursting through the door, exclaiming to Harvey, "She has gotten so fast, I can't believe how amazingly quick our 8 year old is!" Harvey then burst into laughter. "What? What are you laughing about?" Now for the painful realization. "Lindsay, she is fast, but have you considered that fact that you are extremely SLOW!" No, I have never considered the fact that I was slow. I reflected immediately on that time I came in 3rd place in my elementary fun days sprint. Always having based my quick speed on my 3rd place ribbon, never having considered the fact, that I was miles away from the girl that took 2nd place. Harvey then looked me in the eye, "Lindsay, I am sorry to tell you this but you are truly one of the slowest "sprinters" I have ever known." Savannah came whizzing around the corner, "Mom you really are kind of slow." I have to admit at this point I was at a self-esteem low, but still quite astonished. I honestly had never considered this.

So there it is, we will always have these moments when we learn something new about ourselves. Whether they be painful moments, such as this one, or glorious moments, hmmmm, can't think of one right now. But they do occur and I hope they always will. Well, I have to depart now. I need to go running, and apparently very slowly.