A Time for Growth

I saw the numbers go up. Was it possible? Were all these people supporting me and my desire to make a difference? I was touched by their selfless sacrifice. I began to reflect on what inspired me, where did it all begin?

At first it was just a race; something for me to do. I needed a goal, and it sounded good! But I soon realized that my part was more than just running, more than just an entry fee and a quick jog. I had to raise the funds. I severely doubted I was ever going to raise any money. But as I researched the charity my heart began to swell and I remembered...

I remembered the pain, not only the pain she was suffering but the pain of those around her. I remember hearing the sobs of my mother and my sisters. I remembered the sacrifice and service of my caring Aunt and the feelings I had of “What can I do?” At the time I was living away from her. Only phone calls could I offer and as the time drew to an end even the phone calls were of no use. And then I got the news. She died, my sweet Grandma died. I will never forget the pain I felt. The admiration I felt, the tremendous love I felt. She was an incredible woman of countless qualities. My own daughter now bears her name. And although it is her middle name, she is Jane when I am happy; when I am feeling joy, when I am proud of her, when I am singing to her.

Cancer is pain. Cancer is helplessness. Cancer is devastating, heartless, and cruel. I will never forget the feeling of helplessness I had. I will never forgive myself for not being there when she passed away. But there is something I can do now. It will never bring her back, but it will make her proud. That is when the spirit of the race changed for me. It wasn’t about the competition; it wasn’t about achieving a weight loss goal. It was about making a difference. It was about doing something now when I couldn’t then. So I will run…